File: <20220309-FurNet-Agris-Truewolves>

  1. 09 Mar 2022 05:46 with truewolves%wolf.furnet.org@biboumi.nuegia.net
  2. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  3. [05:46:18]
  4. Alright.
  5. I will soon be at work, though, so expect delays.
  6. 15 Mar 2022 18:37 with truewolves%wolf.furnet.org@biboumi.nuegia.net
  7. Tom
  8. [18:37:11]
  9. hello
  10. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  11. [19:16:53]
  12. Hia.
  13. Tom
  14. [19:17:01]
  15. hi
  16. i have some questions for you
  17. why did you become superop on #affection?
  18. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  19. [19:18:01]
  20. Honestly? I didn't even notice until about 2~3 days ago.
  21. Tom
  22. [19:18:08]
  23. ok
  24. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  25. [19:18:30]
  26. I have a guess, and it's that I was helping Azure figure out how to handle the channel rules since he inherited the channel and he's been unsure about that going forward.
  27. Tom
  28. [19:19:00]
  29. do you still feel like everything you did I deserved?
  30. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  31. [19:19:52]
  32. I stated all of my reasons why, and considering you regularly attacked me the entire time, your behavior was quite self-evident. The logs are a clear record of all of our conversations.
  33. Tom
  34. [19:20:25]
  35. Can you please share with me the allegations that made made against me that you acted upon
  36. and who made them
  37. I didn't ask you why, I just asked if you still feel I deserved every bit
  38. *Can you please share with me the allegations that were made against me that you acted upon and who made them <- fixed grammer
  39. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  40. [19:22:07]
  41. 1: Multiple users (more than 2) stated you're stalking/harassing them. I have repeatedly said I will not give away someone's information out of their safety. For the same reason you wouldn't want reprisal done to you for seeking help.
  42. 2: You repeatedly misrepresented arguments you disagreed with to make them easier to attack, even when asked to stop doing this. You continued to do this multiple times in our private conversations, which has also been logged.
  43. No more or less than the two things above.
  44. Tom
  45. [19:23:38]
  46. well, it's fairly standard practice that if a authority figure is going to take action against someone, they the allegations are shared with them so that they can contest or defend themself against them
  47. I've been victum of a vicious year-long attack of defamation 
  48. people harassing me and stalking me across multiple sites to get me ostracized from them
  49. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  50. [19:24:17]
  51. Not in all cases, such as those where the safety of the individual can not be garenteed. Such as with restricted reporting in the military for sexual assault, or witness protection cases.
  52. Tom
  53. [19:24:19]
  54. people making bogus claims against me
  55. my last question to you
  56. > It wouldn't be the first time I've testified in a court proceeding. You?
  57. > For record, if you want any further proof I live by what I say, I don't exactly hide who I am in real life either. And you haven't provided me with any evidence on *any* front that you're not at fault for *either* action.
  58. you told me this before
  59. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  60. [19:25:08]
  61. You asked previously if I would go to court with the evidence I have, and I would. It wouldn't be my first court case.
  62. Tom
  63. [19:25:19]
  64. Can you please share with me your name, place of domocile, and mailing address
  65. this is for court purposes
  66. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  67. [19:26:06]
  68. I will share my name and city, nothing more. Drake Higgins of Albuquerque, New Mexico. That is enough to pull me up on public record and for legal identification without going as far as to be easily able to impersonate me.
  69. Tom
  70. [19:26:11]
  71. it's very clear to me this harassment isn't going to stop, and if what your saying is true there are multiple people in it
  72. you claim to know sometihng
  73. thankyou
  74. *in on it
  75. and since you said this isn't your first time dealing with this, do you have any advice for me?
  76. also, i take it your going to continue to ban me
  77. is that correct?
  78. more than 2 users? your fully sure about that?
  79. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  80. [19:29:31]
  81. I will uphold the ban until there is an appeal addressing improved behavior on both issues.
  82. Tom
  83. [19:30:10]
  84. both issues being what exactly?
  85. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  86. [19:30:26]
  87. I'm not repeating myself for a question that has literally been answered in the last 10 minutes.
  88. Tom
  89. [19:30:50]
  90. oh the numbered thing
  91. well, on number 2 i can tell you is probably a miscommunication
  92. number 1 is a defamatory claim that is untrue
  93. do you have any advice for me, and your absolutely sure than more than 2 people are behind this
  94. ?
  95. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  96. [19:34:21]
  97. As for advice: I'd suggest slowing down in a disagreement learning to identify when you're making leaps of logic. I don't really care what you're arguing about (though #affection was not a channel for debate/arguing anyhow) but when you're making up claims or changing what was said to argue with it, you're being both illogical and disrespectful and that can cause unneeded problems for everyone 
  98. involved. As for stalking? I'd suggest speaking to a profesional therapist, but depending on your occupation/country, I understand that can be rather difficult for some people. Being careful about self-diagnosis of things online, since most people who want to give advice (myself included) are not experts. It's why I refer to an expert. I had more than 2 people talk to me about concerns of stalking 
  99. or harassing, not wanting to make a fuss about it. A reminder that I did not ban you on that alone, even with the evidence, until seeing your behavior myself.
  100. Both very well could be miscommunication. Communication is difficult. Mistakes can often happen from the sender, through the enviorment (like text) and to the reciver. Most often a combination of the 3.
  101. But if multiple issues of miscommunication can be narrowed down to a singular source of those 3, then it becomes a prime target of focus for working on those issues. Just because it's miscommunication doesn't mean you can't improve your own ability of communication to help compensate for it. I myself used to be terrible at most forms of communication before it became a job requirement and I 
  102. learned, piece by piece, how to improve myself.
  103. Ultimately, always placing blame on everything else just means you never improve yourself.
  104. Tom
  105. [19:37:28]
  106. no i mean advice for a victum of cyberbullying and defamation
  107. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  108. [19:37:59]
  109. Hm...
  110. I have to head to bed here, but I'll post something before I do so, as that's a very good question to ask.
  111. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  112. [19:42:19]
  113. A positive reputation/history of positive community building behavior helps protect against attempts to undermine. Matt (or "mst") of freenode(now libera chat) was repeatedly and regularly defamed by people who were banned from the networks (usually for spamming/bullying others or using botnets) but it rarely sticked because he regularly upheld his own sense of integrity and respect for others. 
  114. The more public you are with actions, the easier this becomes. Sometimes you simply have to block users and move on. Bullys seek attention, positive *or* negative. Feed them nothing and they grow bored, or desperate. Bored and they leave you alone (eventually the community, if enough people ignore/block them) desperate and they're more likely to do something more obviously rulebreaking, which 
  115. gets them more easily banned. Sometimes, some places are just going to be run by people who are power hungry. For such places, it's often better to leave and find another community or start your own. If the place really is a problem for a lot of people, then those people will want something new.
  116. I would like to repeat, though, that I have *logs*. So if you're the one bullying others, even if you don't believe you are, that doesn't mean you arn't. Plenty of people regularly microaggress others, or worse, believing themselves innocent. If all these actions were in real space, I'd be suggesting restraining orders. Since that's not possible online, I'm doing the best I can to ensure peace 
  117. and comfort for people who are just trying to enjoy themselves safely online.
  118. Tom
  119. [19:44:03]
  120. some bullies follow you around the internet to defame and destroy your character before you have a chance to build that
  121. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  122. [19:44:13]
  123. Any examples?
  124. Tom
  125. [19:44:25]
  126. me
  127. right now
  128. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  129. [19:44:43]
  130. I mean the actions. You keep asking me for logs, yet supply none of your own of other people.
  131. Or names.
  132. Tom
  133. [19:46:06]
  134. i don't know if your one of them
  135. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  136. [19:47:01]
  137. Well, you have logs of everything I've said in this DM. I haven't mentioned you since in #affection since we last spoke, or any channel. And you could ask anyone about that. I can't imagine why everyone on the network would lie to a single person.
  138. Tom
  139. [19:47:24]
  140. everyone on the network?
  141. truewolves%wolf.furnet.org
  142. [19:47:30]
  143. To be honest, I've got more important things to worry about than someone I've banned when I'm not speaking to them.